Art and Obstacles

When I started this second art project, I had envisioned the body at the bottom as the left over char with some flames coming through, or perhaps just the hint of embers. Then smoke rising from it to become a flaming beauty rising from the ash, having overcome ... I don't know, whatever it was that caused her to burn to begin with. I can see it in my mind, beautiful and shining, with a dark background.

However, not being experienced with producing flames by hand, I had to do some trials. I don't know *why* I am showing you my process of thinking out loud, but here it is.

First thing I did was play with the shape of flames. And whether or not I should give her wings.

In the end, she just looked furry, but I figured that's what sketched flames look like, since I wasn't coloring anything, just messing with shapes.

Artwork

I spent some time yesterday updating my 'portfolio' blog. I don't think I'd use it to apply for a job anywhere yet, but I added a lot of the stuff I worked on last year before all of my creativity disappeared.

If you're feeling bored, you're welcome to take a look: vansoolenartworks.blogspot.com

Words

I find it somewhat amusing that I can articulate how I'm feeling, but I can't seem to write fiction. Of course, I also find it extremely frustrating.

After Wednesday, as my husband was holding me super tight, afraid to let go, he said, "You should finish your book."

That was super awesome to hear. I'd never heard him be excited or supportive about that particular endeavor before. Not that he complained or said anything against it, but he hadn't been a cheerleader, either.

However, when I sit down and stare at the screen, I don't hear the character's voices. Yeah, yeah, I know I'm crazy, but when I'm in the middle of a writing streak, it's like I'm seeing a movie in my head. I can be each character and act out what they'd say and how they'd say it. I'd hear their voice, then I could put it into words on paper.

Is it a cup? Or a pocket? Or a backpack?

Tonight, I met someone who not only used her bra as a phone holder, but as a holder for keys and I'm not quite sure what else. Was I being rude by trying to figure out what I was looking at?

By the time I realized that I was trying to figure out what all the shapes and shadows were on and around her cleavage, I realized that I was staring at her cleavage.

-- Awkward.   For me. Obviously not her; she didn't seem to mind at all. --

The artist in me wondered if I could get away with doing a quick sketch to record the ridiculousness that I felt had become her bosom.

-- still staring at her cleavage --

The mother in me hoped, hoped, hoped that my girls wouldn't think that they were seeing the new up and coming fashion and try to emulate it.

-- can't. look. away. She just pulled out a pen. A PEN! and wrote with it. AND SHE PUT IT BACK IN THERE! --

The woman in me wondered how in the world she could stand having all that stuff mushed in her tank top with her ladies. Ok, yeah, when I'm nursing new babies I go numb there, but that's out of self preservation. Purposely filling up the area around my areolas with pens and keys just because I don't want to wear pants with pockets? Or carry a purse? OUCH!

Admittedly, the cups of my bra aren't all that big, but they're full of what they're full of. And that does not include cold metal bitey things that can scratch and hurt.

-- Yep, still staring. Look away, look away!--

The curious cat in me wondered if she had incredible pain tolerance. Perhaps I should be in awe? Or give her some kind of award for creativity? Or maybe her boobs were somehow formed to be more utilitarian than decorative or recreational?

They really ARE a shelf to hold food that won't stay on your plate! Check this out: They come with extra storage space underneath with the right bra attachments!

-- definitely still staring. I'm going to start snickering if I don't turn my foot, pivot, and look at other people in the room RIGHT NOW--

Oh sure. I looked around, but at this point I was completely entertained by the whole thing. Instead of hearing the actual conversations going on around me, I began wondering what the new marketing campaigns were going to sound like.

Check out my boobs with the nobby bobbles on one side and key shaped edges on the other! Who wants that boring round shape, when you can have handles, edges, and texture?

It's no longer, "What do you have in your wallet?" but "What do you have in your bra?"

Before long, manufacturers of the boulder holders will have zippers for loose change and beepers for lost bits that get missed in the folds of those who are well endowed. Bra straps will come equipped with snazzy leashes or ties for ease of use when texting. Phones will automatically flip back into place on the chest for prominent display when the phone is not in use. Maybe they'll add flashing lights and glitter to the phone holder?

For those like me who have little to no cleavage, the new miracle bra would not only lift and shape, but have strategically placed pockets so my wallet and credit cards could provide maximum enhancement to my assets.

Removing our bras at the end of the day would be like removing Batman's utility belt, only with more gadgets, because you KNOW we're gonna find a place for lip gloss and mascara. Along with bandaids, scissors, dental floss, extra panty hose, super glue, and maybe some fingernail polish alongside the grappling hooks, wings, stun-guns, night sticks, grenades, and other kick-ass super hero gear that being a woman calls for. And apparently our breasts are the beasts of burden to carry it all along with our phones. Who knew?

It's plausible that phones are becoming the 'sock' for women. How big is that bulge in your bra? "Ooooh, what kind of phone do YOU have in there? Mine's heated in the winter and air conditioned in the summer." "Well MINE tells me when it's time to feed the baby before I get engorged." "Yeah? Well MINE can tell me the exact nutritional content of today's lactation, and how to adjust my diet accordingly." "/scoff/ MY phone uses my natural cold weather detectors as a thermostat."

Or maybe all that crap in the bra will make folks like me wonder, "Just what are you compensating for?"  Aaaaaaaand that takes me into an unexplored metaphorical area of phones and women's anatomy I am just not willing to explore any further.

Success vs Failure

I have been trying to figure out how one measures success.  I feel like a failure so often that when I step outside myself and look at my life, I have to wonder what I can say I succeed at. And by what measuring stick do I check?

As a working mom/wife, I climbed that corporate ladder. I was good at it. Probably going to sound vain here, but if I put my mind to it, I learned quickly and became very good at what I did. I made twice as much as my husband. And I hated it. Ok... I loved the travel when I worked for Marriott. AND the travel when I worked for the cable company. But aside from the travel, I really hated it. So is that a success? I'm not sure.

A Peace Treaty of Sorts

I have two different blackberry bushes in my yard. In the front yard is the "I'm going to take over the world with kindness and big juicy berries!" Blackberry bush.

When these berries ripen, they are 1.5 to 2 inches long, bursting with flavor and practically hop right off the vine into my hands. As you can see, there are few, if any, thorns to be seen on the vine or anywhere near the berries. Harvesting from this vine is an absolute pleasure and I look forward to going out there every morning to see what has ripened.

Things I learned at CONduit

I am in a listy kind of mood today, so here is my list of fun things I learned this weekend. For those of you who don't know about CONduit, here's their link!

1 - It is never too late to follow your dreams. Well, unless you’re dead. So unless you know a necromancer, if you’re dead it’s probably too late.  BUT as long as you’re still alive and breathing, go chase those dreams!!!

My friend Peggy wore this T-Shirt to the Con, and I was secretly wishing I had one, too. Now I know where to buy one, click the link and go to OffWorldDesigns and show them some love :)  They have the best t-shirts ever.

One Plus One is Three??

Some of you know that I’m writing a novel. The fun thing about writing a novel is the asking of questions and then figuring out the answers. What if hand-guns could shoot pulses of sound? What if a person’s skin and eye color were direct reflections of the exact location in which they were born? Can you imagine what all those babies born in hospitals would look like? That could have an impact on a society that cares about exterior color or maybe they’d just adapt and pregnant women would go on an exodus hoping that the eye color would match this sea or that sky. Except maybe it didn’t always work that way and maybe it was the hair that turned blue. Or the skin. All kinds of things could go crazily wrong with this, which is great!

Happy Birthday

I made a card for my friend's birthday. We've sort of fallen out of touch over the years, but I love her dearly. I facebooked her this digi-card today. It's a picture of the tree in my back yard, which I'm convinced has a door to Fae in it.

And this one I made for the world:

quotes

yeah, yeah... I'm jumping on the quote bandwagon. But I loved this quote, so I played for a  bit in photoshop and InDesign with it.